These last three days have been an absolute blast for me. A few of you guys know what I'm talking about. Finding out some of the great things God has planned for my life is seriously mind-blowing. Last Saturday night, I was getting ready to read my Bible before going to bed around 2:30 (I needed to get up at 4:30) so as I sat down I thought, "Where to read?" "Habakkuk." "Habakkuk?" I thought to myself..."Why, cause you've never read it before? lol" So...I turned there to check it out....
....The second verse of the first chapter stopped me immediately. So, I decided to read on. I wrote down the verses that spoke that special something to me. I had only an envelope on my sidetable that had two other quotes written on it. And in the last three days, I've read the envelop quite a few times. I'm not sure, perhaps it's just really special to me, but maybe it means something to someone else as well.
"O, Lord, how long shall I cry, and You will not hear? Even cry out to You...and You will not save. "Look...and watch - be utterly astounded! For I will work a work in your days which you would not believe, though it were told you."" -Habakkuk 1:2,5 (NKJV)
...I don't know about you, but that screams to me. I couldn't believe what I just read...but there was more.
""Write the vision and make it plain...that he may run who reads it. For the vision is yet for an appointed time; But at the end it will speak, and it will not lie. Though it tarries, wait for it; because it will surely come, it will not tarry."" -Habakkuk 2:2-3 (NKJV)
....What makes this so awesome is the part "Write the vision and make it plain...that he may run who reads it." That's something that happened a long while back. It's sort of an inside joke between God and I. Without getting too personal, a long while ago I told someone that God told me he was my future husband. Now you should understand that verse from my point of view. Absolutely hilarious!!! I just read this for the first time 4 days ago...this happened nearly four years ago. Yes, it was "plain" and yes, hahaha "he ran who read it". But I'm still standing on that promise. In fact, God has shown me what's going on behind the curtain...and it seems even more hopeless...but I know God works things out the way He sees fit to do so. It's been difficult but I wouldn't change a thing. I cherish it...it's something almost sacred to me. I could never trade it.
As a human I want to know things. I want to be sure of something before I do it. Not with God...you can't be that way. God wants us to be faithful and put our trust in Him. It isn't easy...but it is worth it. It takes a lot of patience and faith to do so. But doing otherwise is us being stubborn. *Enter yet another quote from the envelope*
"Which part of my future do I care so little about that I can afford to be stubborn? I can't think of any." -Mark Hoover
I can't think of any either....so I deemed it all necessary. No matter what the cost...no matter the pain...I must finish what God set before me. And I did. I finished! Isn't that fantastic!!! I woke up the morning after my trip, and found that I felt inside...not heartache...but something fantastic. The absence of heartache. Freedom, pure and simple. The heavy burden I've carried around from the time I "wrote the vision" till now...it's gone. My task has been completed and I'm so happy to feel the freedom. It's quite an amazing thing. Which brings me to another quote from my envelope.
"The greater the perceived threat...the greater the actual reward." -Stephan Arterburn
I love that. It's so true, well, in my life at least. I don't want things to be easy. Easy isn't where it's at for me. I don't want things to be convenient.... no, I know what I want. And it is not easy or convenient. But it's worth while. And I want it in every part of my life. Easy and convenient means cheap and lazy. Who really wants that?
"Though the fig tree may not blossom, Nor fruit be on the vines; Though the labor of the olive may fail, And the fields yield no food; Though the flock may be cut off from the fold, And there be no herd in the stalls— Yet I will rejoice in the LORD, I will joy in the God of my salvation. The LORD God is my strength; He will make my feet like deer’s feet, And He will make me walk on my high hills." -Habakkuk 3:17-19 (NKJV)
Sorry, I could no longer hold in my enthusiasm...thanks for reading!
-Jessica Behind The Curtain -Narnia.
Tonight, I'm feeling so alive, tonight I leave it all behind, but I feel so alive tonight.
Tonight, I've found the will to fight, and I know it's going to take some time, but I feel so alive tonight.
So Alive Tonight!! ♫ -Spoken